The smell of your skin lingers on me now: post-breakup reflections

After reading some blogs that I’ve been following lately, I have some new insights.

You’re some time away from your breakup. You are not devastated but still have your moments. You know that they weren’t the one so why aren’t you over them?

It’s more than the good memories and more than your unfruitful efforts. You fell in love not with a person but a routine.

You hate that song that they used to sing in an annoying high pitched voice. You look at your phone but never see their name. You miss being described every adjective in the book. Why? It was a part of a routine!

You miss what they did because they ALWAYS did that. You miss the texts, cuddles, hanging out and extra-curriculars because it was an expected routine of your relationship. In spite of this, your routine may not reflect who your significant other is but rather who they were AS YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER. They loved you, were affectionate towards you and wanted to build a future with you but people change. Unless explicitly stated, this change probably had nothing to do with you.

What you need to focus on is your needs. Would you rather someone call you every adjective in the book (ex. The most beautiful and sweetest girl in the world) or in the words of Dr.Phil, put verbs in their sentences (ex. No guy makes me happier than you)?

I realized that good friend and fellow blogger, Leandro Diaz-Matus, and I had the same relationship at different times. There’s only one question that led us to think that they weren’t the one:

Would you rather live one day happier or one more day miserable?

The honesty was that we were both miserable and could be happier.

Forget about the routine. The right person will not bring about routine but adventure.

Sincerely,
The Modern Day Fairy Godmother

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By The Modern Day Fairy Godmother Posted in moving on

2 comments on “The smell of your skin lingers on me now: post-breakup reflections

  1. “You are not devastated but still have your moments.” I love this line because it’s exactly how I feel now. A month or two ago I was consumed by nothing but the thoughts of her and the breakup. All I could do was obsess over every detail… “What did she mean when she said that?” or “Should I say this or that or let it be?” It was nothing but minutes grinding by at an agonzing pace. Now, I spend half the time thinking about those things and I actually find myself smiling sometimes when I briefly get distracted and forget about things. But like you said I “still have my moments.” Lord help us all if a Bruno Mars song or Jason Mraz song comes on because I’m diving over someone to change it. Overall, I think the encouraging thing is to realize that we ARE better today then yesterday and WILL be better tomorrow than today. Here’s to the light at the end of the tunnel:)

    • Thanks very much! I swear I hear more love songs now than I did when I was with my ex. Now I don’t get a gut wrenching feeling but more so annoyed. I definitely miss the routine but again, I’m a hopeless romantic and know that love is out there. I believe that our soulmates won’t make us happy like a three minute song but for a lifetime. Thanks for inspiring this article 🙂

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