The best and longest-lasting couples always say this quote or as my 65 year old Italian great-aunt said at a bridal shower a few months ago: “a good marriage only needs lots of love and lots of sex”. That woman caused much laughter that day but the fact of matter is that love is not complicated and it doesn’t need to be.
It is important to address something that bothers you but it is not necessary to make every little annoyance the commencement of WWIII. Not everything is going to be perfect about your significant other and certain things are going to be little quirks that will drive you crazy.
My aunt and my uncle have been married for almost 12 years. My aunt knows that my uncle is stubborn and can be set in his ways. She will put him in his place when needed but the little things he feels so inclined to be right about is when she will just allow him to have his moments and then later ask, “are you done now?”
Want a more personal example? Take Superman and I. Two night ago while watching The Bachelor in Paradise, I was texting him but his responses felt like I had to pull teeth and he would take forever to message back. Instead of being frustrated, I decided to check up on him and ask if he was okay. He mentioned that he was playing a video game with a friend and all I did was laugh while thinking, “He is definitely a guy!” I have a younger brother so this doesn’t phase me. I guess Superman got the hint that I wanted a little more attention and apologized but I also told him that in times like those, I have no problem giving him his space so that more time could be spent talking to me later while encouraging time with friends.
When you don’t sweat the small stuff, you achieve understanding rather than creating strife. Choose your battles wisely. Don’t let anything fester but at the same time, don’t scrutinize every little thing someone does. In this manner, you will both value one another as a whole rather than picking apart only certain things you like.
The Modern Day Fairy Godmother