What to Do If You’re Single for 2016

What to Do If You’re Single for 2016

Hello everyone,

 

Hope you all had a wonderful Christmas/holiday! I have been addressing advice for couples for a while that I thought it would be a nice change to talk about single individuals and give some advice there.

Being single during the holidays can sometimes feel like a prison sentence. You just avoided the mistletoe and questions about when you will get a girlfriend/boyfriend/married. Now, 2016 approaches and you can’t help but see all the couples canoodling. Although there is nothing more you would rather do than make out with the cutie you met at the club an hour ago, it’s probably not the best idea, especially after a recent breakup. Here are some tips to make the end of 2015 and the start of 2016 the best it can be:

  1. Spend time with your family. If they are not too annoying. Sometimes, realizing that there are more important things than a significant other brightens your mood. Also, you are not paying crazy prices for amazing homemade food and a place to sleep.
  2. Have a house party with your friends. Club cover charge? Forget it! Have the fun at home. Order in a pizza, play some board games or drinking games, and dance the night away while counting down until midnight. You will find that you had more fun this way than by doing anything else.
  3. Spend time volunteering for a local charity, such as a soup kitchen. It will be good to realize that there are worse things than being single during the holidays.
  4. Do something fun other than getting sweaty with half-naked people at a club. Go bowling. Gather your friends and go to a pub. Go watch a movie. Whatever you do, delete your ex’s phone number. No one wants a 2016 to start with regrets.

Being single is never a bad thing. Don’t treat it like it is.

Have a wonderful 2016!

Sincerely,

The Modern Day Fairy Godmother

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Struggling to find your significant other a gift? Here’s your answer!

Struggling to find your significant other a gift? Here’s your answer!

So it’s six days until Christmas Day. If you are smart like me, your gift shopping is already done and just needs to be wrapped. If you are like the majority of people reading this and the title caught your eye, you are in a bit of a panic. Don’t worry, there is still time. After all, there are six days left.

I have read dozens of articles about the “Perfect Gift for Him/Her” and have heard the familiar lament of people claiming that men or women are difficult to buy gifts for.

I am about  to tell you something revolutionary to solve this problem.

 

 

Are you ready?

 

 

I am not sure if you are.

 

 

It is going to solve everything…..

 

 

 

 

 

 

THEY ARE NOT DIFFICULT TO BUY FOR!!!!

 

In fact, you are the one who is making it difficult for yourself. It is a matter of being attentive. We give our significant others hints without even knowing it. If you have ever been casually strolling through a mall, there will definitely be one thing they will point out that they like or something that you pointed out that they thought was nice. If you remember that moment, there is an idea.

 

Also, it was probably brought up in conversation. Remember laying down and just talking about childhood experiences or funny things you are a fan of? That’s the perfect inspiration for a gift. Superman remembered that I did ballet as a kid and got me tickets to go see The Nutcracker and I remembered that he never went to see a Leafs game and I got him tickets for a game.

However, you don’t need to be as extravagant as us. Sometimes, getting creative is never a bad thing. Do a scrapbook of favourite memories or a photo album. Knit or paint them something if that’s what you are into. After all, it is the thought that counts.

Hope this helps!

Sincerely,

The Modern Day Fairy Godmother

Gallery

Open Letter for our Anniversary.

I wish I wrote my anniversary letter like this. So romantic!

Thought Diary

I chose you. And I’ll choose you over and over again.

Here’s to a wonderful year we had and to more years ahead!

BeautyPlus_20151213001043_save

We have come a long way, but we have a longer way to go. We have many more highs to share along with a few lows. Our anniversary is that point in our love’s journey where we can pause and realize how we have been so blessed to have each other. 

It’s on this same day when we decided to love each other. It’s been a year since that day, but I never have regrets. There was never a time I regretted choosing you over a 7-year old relationship. Despite the mess I put you into… you’re still here. Our first four months must had been very hard for you. Yet never did you waver.

You already have endured my childish attitude for a year, isn’t it…

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Why Am I Single? Because I Refuse To Lower My Standards.

Why Am I Single? Because I Refuse To Lower My Standards.

Love this post!

BrownVagabonder

Bicycle. Photo attributed to Sona Dhawan. Bicycle. Photo attributed to Sona Dhawan.

Why are you single? A lot of guys probably want to be with you. No, a lot of guys want to fuck me. – Anonymous

My sister and I share the horrors of dating with each other every few weeks. Over and over again, a theme emerges. Guys don’t want to put in the work required to get to second base or third. They go out for coffee with us, and right away, without any sparks, or any interest on either side, they go in for a kiss or something more. When we decline or deny them that pleasure, they get angry, and nasty. They start insulting us. I have been called an ice-princess, prude, cold, etc.

On more than one occasion, I have been sent pictures of intimate parts without any ask from me. Not only that, when I got offended for seeing a…

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Man. Crush. Monday

Man. Crush. Monday

Kbeautifulmind

Man. Crush. Monday

This one’s for the men who still believe in chivalry.
The one’s opening doors, giving forehead kisses, dedicating songs, committing and appreciating one woman instead of trying to juggle 3 or 5 at a time.
This one’s for the men who make the effort, who go out their way to spend time with a woman,who rather call or face time instead of just text with… “WYD.”
The one’s who cherish the women in their lives and respect them like they would respect their own mother or sisters.
This one’s for the men that are honest and faithful, instead of acting like children and playing stupid games.
The one’s who rather see a woman strong and smiling, instead of weak and in tears.
This one’s for REAL men who have never abused (verbally or physically) a woman, raped, belittled, or hurt her emotionally just because it’s what they…

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Breakup Lines in Translation

Breakup Lines in Translation

Breakups are horrible. You may come across a wonderful person with whom it didn’t work out and it was mutual. You may have had to break up with someone because this person was no longer for you and it was really difficult because the feeling was not mutual.

However, the absolute worst thing is when someone breaks up with you and you were not expecting it. You loved them so much, how could they possibly do this to you?

The most important thing in a breakup is honesty. However, this is a concept that is very rarely applied when mindlessly crushing the heart of someone that loved you.

Here are the excuses that are most commonly made and are translated into what they actually mean. If you are the one giving these excuses, you should take a very hard look at yourself and change this behaviour for the new year.

  1. “We have grown apart”– I have not made an effort as much as you have to make this work, I don’t respect how you evolved as a person and I have more important things on my mind.
  2. “I have so many issues that I need to fix by myself”, *you ask why, what they are and if you can help*, “I don’t want to talk about them, you would never understand”-I betrayed you in some shape or form and don’t want to admit it.
  3. “You deserve someone better”-This is my way of admitting that I have treated you so poorly and you probably don’t even know the half of it.
  4. “I love you but I’m not in love with you”-I have fallen in love with someone else.
  5. “I have lost feelings for you”-I now have feelings for someone else [insert name of best friend, ex, co-worker, friend that they said was “just a friend”]
  6. “I’m not as wonderful/amazing/perfect as you”-I have some serious issues and I shouldn’t have gotten into a relationship before I learned to love myself. Yes, I basically dragged you through the mud during these past months/years.
  7. “I’m not ready for a relationship/anything serious/a commitment”-I am not ready for a relationship/anything serious/a commitment with YOU and I want to play the field.
  8. “I don’t love you as much as you love me”-There is probably truth in this but I am using love as a competition and making myself look like a victim so I can escape.
  9. “It’s not you, it’s me”- I am a scumbag and can’t think of anything better to say.

If you have come across one, or ALL of these breakup lines like I have, you just dodged a major bullet and them no longer being in your life will be the best thing that ever happened to you. Don’t make excuses for them, just show them the door and one day, you will open a new door with a smile.

Sincerely,

The Modern Day Fairy Godmother

Why Dress Code affects Dating Rituals

Why Dress Code affects Dating Rituals

I never knew that the level of someone’s sexual desires could ever be determined by the presence of a collar bone.

It amazes me that we are still producing a sharp rape culture for women and many of these institutions are not corresponding with the twenty-first century.

A woman’s body is often deemed inappropriate in this manner. Girls, at a rather young age, are taught to pull down their shirts, cover their shoulders and to not bare their knees. I clearly remember that if I wore a tank top with straps that the straps had to be “three fingers” in width and I was the talk of the classroom when I wore short skorts.

The emphasis increased in high school, especially in Catholic high schools. I went to one and I did not mind not having to think about what I had to wear each morning nor having people judge me on what I wear. I was made fun of in kindergarten for not wearing Nike sneakers, in elementary school for wearing velour tracksuits and ironically, in eighth grade, I was told that my Nike sneakers were fake (note to self: Nike apparently causes trouble among kids!). However, dress code was very strict. There was only a selection of three colours of undershirts you can put under your polo (then it was change to specific gradients, such as navy blue, not baby blue), kilts were banned and shoes had to be all black with absolutely no shred of colour on them such as a logo. It was constricting.

We went on a retreat in the ninth grade in order to ease the transition to high school. We were allowed to wear our regular clothes. One of the girls in my group wore a low-cut shirt which embraced her ample cleavage and was told by one of the teachers that she couldn’t wear it because “it would distract the boys”. I’m sorry but how is this not creating the assumption that women are walking sexual objects that need to be covered up?

My mother still tells me to pull my shirt down when it is short. Unless I am in a place of worship, that is not inappropriate!

Women can wear crop tops, short shorts, ripped jeans, low-cut shirts, fitted dresses, short dresses, mini-skirts, hoop earrings, fish-net stockings, six inch stilettos or be stark naked. Unless they directly ask you to have sex with them, in this form:

“Do you want to have sex with me?”

THEY ARE NOT ASKING FOR IT!!!!

It’s the equivalent of saying that a shirtless man on the beach is fair game. You can see this in the media. Look at the recent commercial for Just Fab Shoes. There is a man asking the assumed female viewer “what it will take” for them to buy shoes from their website. He presents a couple of pairs of shoes and then asks if the viewer would like him shirtless, takes off his shirt and says “done”.

This commercial demonstrates the sexualization of both genders by using a man to sell a  product but it shows the sexualization of women more as they are “so tempting” that a man has to take his shirt off and that they will do anything for an attractive man.

Michelle Obama has worn dresses that bare her shoulders but we would never say that she is asking for it. Why? She is married, middle-age and in a position of power. Isn’t this disappointing that we are targeting single, young women who we are degrading instead of empowering?

I remember when I was assaulted at a club in Montreal. I was simply waiting to get a drink at the bar when I was touched inappropriately multiple times. I used self-defense, grabbed my friends and got out of there. I was in tears, very uncomfortable and upset and was told by my friends, “what did you expect?”

What did I expect? I expected to have a good night out with my friends, laughing and pretending that I am Beyonce on the dancefloor. I did not expect to be sexually assaulted.

Enough with the victim-blaming. Enough with the sexualization. Enough with the gender inequality.

Most important, enough with the VIOLENCE and SUBORDINATION of women.

Sincerely,

The Modern Day Fairy Godmother