Breakups are horrible. You may come across a wonderful person with whom it didn’t work out and it was mutual. You may have had to break up with someone because this person was no longer for you and it was really difficult because the feeling was not mutual.
However, the absolute worst thing is when someone breaks up with you and you were not expecting it. You loved them so much, how could they possibly do this to you?
The most important thing in a breakup is honesty. However, this is a concept that is very rarely applied when mindlessly crushing the heart of someone that loved you.
Here are the excuses that are most commonly made and are translated into what they actually mean. If you are the one giving these excuses, you should take a very hard look at yourself and change this behaviour for the new year.
- “We have grown apart”– I have not made an effort as much as you have to make this work, I don’t respect how you evolved as a person and I have more important things on my mind.
- “I have so many issues that I need to fix by myself”, *you ask why, what they are and if you can help*, “I don’t want to talk about them, you would never understand”-I betrayed you in some shape or form and don’t want to admit it.
- “You deserve someone better”-This is my way of admitting that I have treated you so poorly and you probably don’t even know the half of it.
- “I love you but I’m not in love with you”-I have fallen in love with someone else.
- “I have lost feelings for you”-I now have feelings for someone else [insert name of best friend, ex, co-worker, friend that they said was “just a friend”]
- “I’m not as wonderful/amazing/perfect as you”-I have some serious issues and I shouldn’t have gotten into a relationship before I learned to love myself. Yes, I basically dragged you through the mud during these past months/years.
- “I’m not ready for a relationship/anything serious/a commitment”-I am not ready for a relationship/anything serious/a commitment with YOU and I want to play the field.
- “I don’t love you as much as you love me”-There is probably truth in this but I am using love as a competition and making myself look like a victim so I can escape.
- “It’s not you, it’s me”- I am a scumbag and can’t think of anything better to say.
If you have come across one, or ALL of these breakup lines like I have, you just dodged a major bullet and them no longer being in your life will be the best thing that ever happened to you. Don’t make excuses for them, just show them the door and one day, you will open a new door with a smile.
The Modern Day Fairy Godmother