How To Get Through A Rough Patch 

Hey everyone! 

It feels so good to be back. I have been busy but I have also been learning. Next weekend will mark Superman and I’s 3rd anniversary. Although we are very happy, we have also had our challenges. 

Rough patches are a matter of growth: either growing together or growing apart. Both are valuable learning experiences but what if you want to get out of one? 

Firstly, in order to succeed as a couple through a rough patch, it takes TWO people to make it work. Otherwise, just end the relationship now. Having one person do all the work is like a seesaw just becoming an upright stick in the sand. 

Secondly, evaluate your self-respect. If you feel like being with this person equates with diminishing your self-worth, you deserve better. Even though relationships are selfless, they must also be selfish. Is this relationship benefitting you mind, body and soul? If it’s not, they are not the person for you. 

Thirdly, assess the underlying interests. Do you think that there is a lack of respect? Are you going through a rough time in your life? Do you feel unappreciated? You can’t beat around the bush with these. By being open and honest, you can achieve mutual understanding and resolution.

Finally, give things both space and time. If you both love one another and are willing to put in the work, success is possible. It won’t happen overnight but it can eventually work. 

As the song goes, “just the two of us. We can make it if we try”. 

Sincerely, 

The Modern Day Fairy Godmother 

I Can Live Without You

They say that you should marry the person you can’t live without.
I can live without you. I can get my tired ass up to eat my three 400 calorie meals a day, slave over essays and spend mind numbing hours at work. 
I can still succeed because I’m a hard worker and was before you came into my life. 
I can still be happy because you are not the sole root of my happiness. My happiness began with myself and the people and things in my life are the branches.
But…
Who would I share my triumphs, sorrows and challenges with? Sure I can share those with friends and family but there is something truly unique about your understanding, encouragement and support. 
Who would make me laugh and smile so much that I felt like I was dating a childhood best friend? No one truly ignites my soul like you do. 
Who would inspire me with their ambition, creativity and passion? I have people in my life but no one I really consider so similar to me.
One can get used to lack of companionship, affection and attention. At the same time, a tired, miserable couple can live with one another, even though they are reluctant to do so.
You are not my addiction nor a filling of a void, so my love for you isn’t a sedation for a hatred of living my own life. 
You’re in my life because simply YOU are in my life and that is what I love. 
So in these ways, yes I can live without you but why the hell would I WANT to? 

I love you Superman ❤️

TMDFG

Passion in Your Veins and Dedication to Have It Remain

The other day I was watching The Hundred Foot Journey with my family and one quote really caught my attention:

“In this restaurant, we do not serve others an old tired marriage but rather a passionate affair”.

In this way, the same can be applied to any relationship. You need passion to keep it alive. Love is not only intellectual but also visceral. If your gut is not telling you to be drawn to that person, you don’t belong with them. That passion needs to exist, not merely a sexual one, but an inexplicable attraction that encompasses physical, emotional, mental and intellectual aspects.

At the same time, the passion must be coupled with dedication. Superman and I discussed this at the beginning of our relationship. You can have all the passion, fire and desire out there but if dedication is not continuously fuelling and keeping it stable, your relationship will soon become disastrous. You need that interest but you also need commitment.

This interdependent relationship will allow your relationship to endure. It is a wonderful mix of puppy love and realistic guidelines that fall naturally with the both of you.

Sincerely,

The Modern Day Fairy Godmother

Busy days don’t make us stray

I think that a lot of people make up really poor excuses to break up such as “I fell out of love with you”, “I have to find myself” or the best one:

“Our schedules are not compatible”.

Let’s face it, busy days don’t make us stray. It’s how we truly feel that makes us stay or stray. It’s what in our hearts and who remains in our hearts that determines our level of commitment. If we are not committed, we will find any excuse to avoid and escape.

There are times where we are not 100% ourselves and we would rather sleep than be romantic. However, if we can we still say that we love them and still enjoy their most romantic gestures, that’s what matters.

If you truly love them, you will make time, no matter what the reason.

Sincerely,

The Modern Day Fairy Godmother